P.S. A Column On Things

Start of May 16 Column

Moss-Backed Apple Knocker I

We are where we came from. Some of us have a rich background, a stew of the many places we lived growing up. I was raised in a monoculture. It has its upsides and downsides.

I am from Oregon, whose residents in the 60s proudly referred to themselves as moss-backed apple-knockers. Not just anywhere in Oregon, of course, a state which encompasses rain forest on the coast, Mediterranean climate in The Valley (Willamette) and desert in the east. I was raised on a single block in the state’s only city, Portland.

I might be forgiven for thinking the world all looks a lot like me, a Swiss-Irish Protestant working-class white kid. Of the 120 students in Beaumont grade school’s class of 1966, there were two Jews, one Catholic, one black student, a chiropractor’s son and a CPA’s son. Otherwise, no professionals: all white, Northern European working class.

Portland was a minor-league town in every sense of the word. Until I was 7, major league baseball was 2,000 miles away (the same distance my great-grandmother covered on foot when she emigrated to Oregon in the 19^th century). The Giants brought it within 600 miles; the Blazers didn’t arrive until I’d left for college.

The Portland Beavers were a Cleveland farm club. Portland had a farm club mentality in all things, not just baseball. In entertainment or the professions, the sometimes unspoken question was, “If you were any good, wouldn’t you be in the majors? (San Francisco, LA, New York). When people from the “big leagues” moved in, they were instantly accorded superior status. We were wowed by those who were “sent down.”

I was raised in a colonial state―from its admission in 1859 until the arrival of Tektronix and Intel, Oregon was a colony of the financial capital in the East, valued only for its natural resources, first beavers, then lumber and eventually filberts/hazelnuts.

That brings up one upside: residents of the Imperial capital are raised with the hubris of assumed superiority, while colonials are humble and feel they must earn their status. That’s worked out well.

I was third-generation Oregonian. No one my age could be more than fifth-generation.

(Next Week: Part II: So Why Did I Leave ?)

Genius

Reprinted from July 7, 2003. Inspired by Kevin Sullivan.

Genius, to me, is the effortless exercise of truly, visibly, obviously extraordinary talent in an endeavor, in a fashion which seems inborn. It is not generic--in fact, as you know from our overlapping time at MIT, scientific geniuses are often social idiots. We knew a few at school. I have met a few in my years as a computer journalist. Bill Gates is a genius at business, more so than at programming, although he was an excellent programmer in his day. Socially, he's inept. So, apparently, is Larry Ellison, a genius whom I've never met. I'd have to say that Bill Clinton is a political genius and a moral idiot.

Those geniuses are all successes. I don't want to name the genius failures I know, because I don't believe any of them would define themselves as failures, despite the lack of financial or personal relationship success in their lives. Genius and success, in my experience, may evince themselves in a single life, but genius is no guarantee of success, and not all successes are geniuses.

Can I recognize genius in my students? Too soon to tell. As a student teacher, I quickly found that I could pretty much stretch the class out on a bell-shaped curve after a week, without reference to the grade book. I don't prejudge. I don't slot students. I fervently believe that anyone can change at any time, as long as they want to change. Alas, so few do. Finely calculating the line between a C and a D and skating on it would not be my idea of a good time, but for many students it appears to be a rousing pastime.

After your note, I reconsidered my coincidental use of the term twice in a column. I stand by it. Amma is a spiritual genius. Jon Carroll is one of the best newspaper writers ever to appear in print in this country. If he worked in the East, he'd have several Pulitzers by now. I hope that, unlike Herb Caen, the committee doesn't wait until he's 80, or, worse yet, that they ignore him forever like Art Hoppe (who he? Great overlooked Chronicle columnist).

[2020 editor’s note: still no Pulitzer for Carroll]

Feel Free to Share

In the early days of this column, and, for that matter, the early days of the Internet, there was a lot more sharing. In the first two years of the online version of PSACOT, not a week went by without a few hundred words from several regular contributors. At the minimum, people were constantly sharing websites, words and pictures. A few of those people are dead, a few became angry at me and disappeared, while the rest have simple become lurkers.

I know you are an intelligent and curious group of people; after all, you read this column. So, feel free to shower down (as we used to say at UPI) jokes, websites, essays, videos and art of interest, in exchange for which I promise you boldface credit (pixels are cheap)

Paul’s Poetry Corner: Six-Foot, Woo!

Link To: Six-Foot, Woo!
Which begins:

(parody of Five-Foot Two)

Six-foot, woo! Eyes of Blue
42 years spent with you,
I love it when I see my gal.

And a poem I did NOT write, but rather a limerick that came to my attention this week:

There once was a girl from Madras
Who had such a beautiful ass -
It was not round and pink
(As you bastards think)
But had two ears, a tail, and ate grass.

Right Column Redux: Paul Pans The Mac

The column to the right on this blog contains permanent content, most of which has appeared at one time or another in the main body. I’ve decided to include a reminder.

Yes, I am the Paul Schindler who predicted, in 1985, on the Computer Chronicles television show, when the Macintosh was a year old, that it wouldn't be a success in business. I stand by that opinion. You can see Paul Schindler Pans Mac

This and That

Marriage
In case you don’t read comments, I’ll note that Robert Malchman responded to my marriage item: “Best description of marriage I've ever heard is that it's like being in a small business partnership that's always in danger of going under.”
…
Dancing Baby

I could swear I featured the dancing baby in this column, but Google and I can’t find it, so here’s the original 1990s version and the new 2020 version. In short, CGI and GIFs have come a long way in 30 years.
…
Like and Follow
A very clever and amusing CGI animation about youthful phone addiction, Like and Follow.

End of May 16 Column (No. 825)

When Timing is Key

Start of May 9 Column

Mother’s Day

"All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother," Abraham Lincoln.

He lost his mother at age 9; I kept mine until I was 58. She’s been gone for a dozen years, but I miss her still. I was a momma’s boy, and my closeness to her made me who I am, so I am grateful.

I was lucky that I married a woman who liked my mother and vice versa, although in the early years of our marriage, my wife was concerned about my weekly telephone calls with my mother. Those tapered off over time.

Mom was a marvelous and talented human being, who turned out two marvelous and talented sons. I fancy that I am carrying on her work of loving kindness.

I am not a man of regret, but I do wish I had been more thoughtful when I pulled up stakes and moved 3,000 miles away to college. Alas, I think we are all pretty self-centered at age 18, so I devoted nary an instant’s thought to the pain she suffered when her beloved son abandoned her. I spent another nine months living with her during the rest of my life, but the first transition was, I think, harder than it needed to be.

Sorry mom. Thanks mom!

Amazing First Paragraph

The first paragraph of a news story, known to journalists as the lede, is supposed to tell you who, what, when, where and how (and sometimes why) in a way that will make you want to read the rest of the story.

Or, it should just knock your socks off.

Here is one from Category Two:

Reps. Marjorie Taylor Greene and Lauren Boebert got into heated clash: report
By Brian Niemietz
New York Daily News
Apr 29, 2022 at 5:29 pm

There was a heated battle of wits between two of the GOP’s most performative congresswomen. Fortunately, neither combatant was armed.
...
Upon hearing about Greene’s appearance at the toxic far right-wing rally earlier in the year, moderate Republican senator Mitt Romney of Utah said he was reminded of a scene from the Western classic “Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid” when one character said, “I’ve got morons on my team.”

Paul’s Poetry Corner: The Queen of Letting Go

Link To: The Queen of Letting GoWhich begins:

I didn’t know it at the time,
But I married the Queen of Letting Go.
I don’t know the King of Letting Go,
But I feel sure I’ll never see him in the mirror,
Unless he stands behind me.

Right Column Redux: Stories of a Young Journalist

The column to the right on this blog contains permanent content, most of which has appeared at one time or another in the main body. I’ve decided to include a reminder.

Stories of a Young Journalist
These are stories from early in my career

Column In The Tech

I’ve been contributing old-timer columns to my college paper. Here are some excerpts from one of them:

Work Life Balance: It’s OK, even here.

I never fully signed onto a full-time job at the Massachusetts Tool or Die Company (a nickname we used in the early 70s). Sometimes, I even went entire Sundays without doing any tooling, not even a problem set. And I was fully invested in my student activities: The Tech and the MIT radio station (then WTBS, now WMBR).

You are not going to turn to your relatives on your deathbed and say, “I wish I’d spent more time doing problem sets.” Feel free to take the path of least resistance. You will still learn, as I did, methods of learning and analysis which will stand you in good stead no matter what you end up doing for a living.

…

In my case the Massachusetts Tool or Die Company came close to turning me into a disc jockey. But as it happens, an optimal work life balance at MIT produced an optimal work life balance in my life as a journalist – one of the most unlikely careers an MIT student can end up in. It could happen to you, if you let it. 

I should note that a 50/50 academics/activities split would have been a literal balance and would probably have been better for me.