Little Known Fairy Tales: Paul Makes The Top 5 List

Any other week, choosing the humor would have been difficult. There was the four travelers in a car story, the funny lines from Star Wars when you insert the word "pants" into the phrase, and the top 10 things said by Klingon programmers. But in the end, all this humor was trumped by two things. 1) I have decided to pick just one humor item each week as the best and 2) I made the Top 5 List. Well, that cinched it, of course. I mean, when your submission makes it onto America's premier peer-reviewed humor list, you gotta go with it. I suppose it will soon be time for another "humor special," where I gather up all the leftover humor from the last weeks into a large, ill-formatted separate file and offer it up to you, my loyal readers. But not this week. Mine is Number 6.

June 18, 1999


The Top 14 Little Known Fairy-Tales



14> Snow White, Seven Dwarfs and a Webcam

13> The Knave Who Choked The Warrior Coach But Is Still Getting Many Pieces Of Gold

12> How To Make $5,000 A Week In Your Spare Time

11> Rapennzoil

10> The Emperor's New Clothes from International Male

9> Booty and the Priest

8> The Supermodel and the Top 5 Contributor

7> Little Red Clitoral Hood

6> Bubba and the Slippery Zipper

5> Johnny Leatherpants and His Magic Nipple Clamps

4> Rumpledforeskin

3> The Ogres of Madison County

2> GoldieHawn and the 3 Plastic Surgeons


and Topfive.com's Number 1 Little Known Fairy-Tale...


1> The Little Engine That Never Will (because the lazy bastard's been a disappointment to me and his mother since day one!)


[ This list copyright 1999 by Chris White ]
[ The Top 5 List [email protected] http://www.topfive.com ]
[ Do not forward, publish, broadcast, or use in any manner ]
[ without crediting "The Top 5 List at www.topfive.com" ]



Selected from 139 submissions from 51 contributors.
Today's Top 5 List authors are:
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John Voigt, Chicago, IL -- 1 (18th #1 / Hall of Famer)
Jeff Scherer, Brooklyn, NY -- 2, 5
Patrick Major, Dallas, OR -- 3
M.J. Finan, Cleveland, OH -- 4, 9
Mitch Berg, Saint Paul, MN -- 4 (Rookie!)
Kevin Hawley, Fairless Hills, PA -- 4
Don Horton, Sacramento, CA -- 4
Martell Stroup, Boston, MA -- 4
Kevin Wickart, Normal, IL -- 4
Lisa Lavoie, Milford, NH -- 4
Paul Schindler, Orinda, CA -- 6
Marsha Clodfelter, Corpus Christi, TX -- 7
Jonathan D. Colan, Miami, FL -- 8
Sam Evans, Charleston, SC -- 10 (Hall of Famer)
Larry Baum, Hong Kong -- 11
Dave Wesley, Pleasant Hill, CA -- 12
Michael Wolf, Brookline, MA -- 13
Elliott Downing, Antioch, CA -- 14
Kevin Freels, Burbank, CA -- Topic
Lev L. Spiro, Los Angeles, CA -- Banner Tag (Hall of Famer)
Jeffrey Anbinder, Ithaca, NY -- Runner Up list name
Bill Muse, Seattle, WA -- HM list name (Hall of Famer)
Chris White, New York, NY -- List owner/editor
Cinderella, Philadelphia, PA -- Ambience