Trumpsonian Crapsody
January 24, 2021
(With apologies to Queen)
By Robert Malchman
Listen to this parody
Is this surreal life? Is this insurgency?
Lost by a landslide, just escaped from reality
Closing your eyes, cook up all the lies and see
I'm just a fool boy, I spread toxicity
Because I'm easy come, will not go, little sly, little slow
Any way my mind goes doesn't really matter to me, covfefe.
MAGA, just killed a cop
Put a can against his head, banged it harder, now he’s dead
MAGA, term was almost done
But now I've gone and thrown it all away
MAGA, ooh, didn't mean to make you die
If I'm impeached again this time tomorrow
Carry on, carry on, as if I had really beat Joe.
Too soon, my crimes see sun
Sends shrinkage down my ‘shroom, bonespurs’ aching from the doom
Goodbye, everybody, I've got no hope
Gotta leave you in a bind just like Fox News
MAGA, ooh (Any way my mind goes)
I don't wanna trial
I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all
I see a little silhouetto of small hands
Scuzzy Mooch, Scuzzy Mooch, now you slam the fat mango?
Boogaloo and White Rights, very, very frightening be
(Nazi-neo) Nazi-neo, (Nazi-neo) Nazi-neo, Nazi-neo Benito
Fascistico-o-o-o
I'm just a con man, nobody loves me
He's just a con man from a con family
Jail him for life for his monstrosity
Sleazy Stone, sleazy Flynn, will they call the Guard in?
Chris Miller! No, he will not call the Guard
(Call the Guard) Chris Miller! He will not call the Guard
(Call the Guard) Chris Miller! He will not call the Guard
(Call the Guard) Will not call the Guard
(Call the Guard) Will not call the Guard
(Never, never, never, never call the Guard) Ah
No, no, no, no, no, no, no
(Oh, MAGA fear-a, MAGA fear-a) MAGA fear-a, stop the steal!
S.D.N.Y. has indictments put aside for me, for me, Rudyyyyyy!
So you think I’ll self-pardon just to face Cy Vance?
So you think my White Trash will awake from their trance?
Oh, baby, don’t think you’ll succeed, baby!
Just gotta get out, just gotta get thugs in the streets.
(Ooh)
(Cooo-vid, Cooo-vid)
Now I cannot Twitter, any racist hate
Now I cannot Parler
Now I cannot Facebook -- too late!
Every day my life blows.
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