By Marjorie Gottlieb Wolfe
Meta, Facebook’s new company name, is a reference to the Greek term for “beyond.” In Hebrew, “Meta” means “dead." In Portuguese and Spanish, it means “goal.”
The company’s stock will start trading as MVRS on Dec. 1. Mark Zuckerberg said, “The metaverse is the next frontier...From now on, we’re going to be metaverse-first, not Facebook-first.”
I remember when Wendy’s changed their Twitter name to "Meat.” We heard customers say, “Nice to meat you, Wendy.” Others joked, “Shoulda let that one cook a bit longer.”
And in 1978, Hershey came out with the Whatchamacallit, a chocolate-coated peanut-crisp-and-caramel candy bar. And the word game, Scrabble, invented by Alfred Mosher Butts, referred to it as Lexico, It, and Criss Cross Words until it was renamed, Scrabble. Scrabble means to collect or hold onto something.
This month, here’s some Meta conversations and quotes that we can expect to hear:
[Einstein Bros. Bagels]
“Have you ever Meta bagel that goes so well with cream cheese and lox?”
[booking agent]
“Never Meta face we couldn’t book!”
“I never Meta sunset I didn’t like.” [Rich Hoffman, weatherman...and others]
“As a Meta of fact, during the 1970s I did enjoy Punk Rock bands such as the Stooges. Yes, they were loud, fast and short.”
[Rachael Ray, celebrity chef]
“It rhymes with Feta!”
“I never Meta football player who said that he thinks of himself as ‘vaccine-adjacent.’’ [refers to Green Bay Packers quarterback, Aaron Rodgers]
“I’ve Meta lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you’re twenty minutes.” [Billy Wilder]
“For all your contacts with JDate, Harmony, Bumble and Hinge dating sites you couldn’t have Meta better match.”
[child to school cafeteria worker] “I never Meta better ‘fluffernutter’ sandwich.”
[puzzle editor, Will Shortz]
“Remember, META—in caps—also means ‘Making Education The Answer,’ ‘Middle East,Turkey, and Africa.’ and ‘Maccabi Elite Tel Aviv.’”
“This all happened because Zuckerberg never Meta girl until college.” (Brandy Jensen)
I never Meta chef who disagreed with this statement: “...brisket will never be a meal for one. It doesn’t come in a single serving size in the freezer of a supermarket. While Lean Cuisine offers eleven varieties in its Comfort Cuisine line, there’s no brisket.” [Stephanie Pierson]
“But I haven’t Meta player or coach whose goal isn’t to win the Super Bowl.” [Pete Rozella]
“I never Meta man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him.” [Galileo Galilei]
“I had the blues because I had no shoes until upon the street I Meta man who had no feet.” [Denis Waitley]“Meta? It’s like someone trying to explain crypto to me when I didn’t ask.” [Robert Alter]
“As our foods have become Americanized for all palates, we’ve seen a Metamorphosis that would make a purist gag. A Jalapeno bagel, for example. Oy!” [Mamie Winston-Macauley]
“I’ve never Meta writer named Joanna G. Harris, BUT I agree with her quote: “I don’t know the medical facts, but pastrami sandwiches and cheesecake, combined with big cigars and a sedentary life at the pinochle table, are said to produce heart attacks.” [“The Brisket Book”]
“I love to flirt, and I’ve never Meta man I didn’t like.” [Dolly Parton]
MARJORIE GOTTLIEB WOLFE says, “I never Meta piece of chocolate covered Joyva halvah that I didn’t like.”